Thursday, August 11, 2011

"Everything's changed, everything is different..."

Well, it’s been a while since I fired one of these up, I also just figured out how to connect Blogspot with Facebook, so I figure I may get a few more views now!

I am writing this post at a very interesting time in my life. A few months back I opened up my e:mail in the morning when I got to work and I read The Word For Today that had been emailed to me saying that “God Will Surprise You”. It spoke about how God brings changes into people’s lives and how the change can be sudden, and unexpected, and can often come out of discomfort.

I now sit here writing this blog post a mere few weeks later, except all of a sudden, that word came very true and everything has changed for me at the drop of a hat – due to unforeseen personal circumstances I am currently unemployed. I still have rent to pay and a vehicle to run, and besides a final pay out from work and a benefit which will start soon, I have no income. However, for the first time ever, I am not worried.

For those of you who know me well, you will know that I am a very plan orientated person. I like things to be ordered and to have structure and I find my safety and security in things that I have built or organized myself as I know the work that has gone into them, therefore I feel that I can trust them. However, God has been changing me from the inside out over the past few years, and has been helping me to deconstruct my prideful desires to control and organize things, and help me to learn to rely more upon Him rather than my own meticulous planning.

I’m reminded of a quote from one of my favourite ever movies, Terminator 2:Judgment Day. Sarah Connor has a voice over section in one part of the movie and she says the following:

“The future, always so clear to me, had become like a black highway at night. We were in uncharted territory now, making up history as we went along”.

That’s exactly how I feel. I’m staring into the future with no employment in sight, making up history as I go along. However, I know that God is riding this black highway with me, and that He knows what He’s doing, even if I don’t know. Being an avid motorcycle enthusiast and former rider, I am very used to piloting a motorcycle on my own and therefore being solely responsible for where it goes. My spiritual walk has been rather similar, admittedly. However, for the first time, God has taken over from me on the pilot’s seat, and I am riding pillion with Him, on the back of the bike, having no idea where we are going. At times it feels like He takes corners a bit too fast for my liking, and seems to go charging ahead when I would prefer to just hang back and play it safe. But, I guess it’s all part of the adventure, something I will have to get used to.

That word came true, alright. God has surprised me. I never expected the changes to come into my life that have arrived. But it’s ok. He’s teaching me to be a good pillion and learn to trust Him with the throttle.

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